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02:16:36 er: Today's schlock mercenary strip is pretty
er-like.
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08:14:21 syv: Why are fists so often *better* than guns at close range?
08:14:58 syv: I haven't won a single round tonight, but once I won a single fistfight against two guys with shotguns.
08:57:33 Devastator: fists do plenty of damage.
08:57:59 Devastator: and most guns have minimum ranges.
08:58:38 Devastator: job's delayed a bit longer due to pipeline explosion.
09:12:46 Devastator: Yeah. Nobody hurt, but it's the one ran by the clownshoes company, so I'm sure we'll find out they had plenty of indications something might go wrong.
09:12:52 Devastator: Unless it ends up being sabotage or something.
09:14:57 Devastator: Sorry, that's the only bit of that I get. Why not?
09:15:29 syv: It's a famous meme, for shame
Dev.
09:16:15 Devastator: Yeah, but it's also not in english.
09:16:47 syv: Bah. Guess I just see Spanish as more normal because I live in Florida.
09:17:13 Devastator: I don't know Spanish at all.
09:17:22 Devastator: only knew 'two' because of Dos Equis beer.
09:17:34 Devastator: and 'why' because it's like the french.
09:17:52 Devastator: Can't really be both,
syv, as there was one explosion.
09:18:00 Devastator: It can't be both accidental and sabotage.
09:18:37 syv: There could've been plenty of indications that there would've been an accident, though. The accident was just beaten by the sabotage.
09:20:21 syv: ...Also, it could be both accidental and sabotage. If the saboteur intended to create some much more minor sabotage, like merely shutting the pipe down, but the improper maintenance made their sabotage become explosive, it would be both.
09:20:40 Devastator: If they find evidence of sabotage, they won't look as closely at the possible indicatiors.
09:20:57 syv: Doesn't mean they aren't there~
09:21:21 syv: Though, to be fair, you did say "we'll find out", so you've got me there.
09:21:21 Devastator: It does mean they won't be in the report published by the power engineers society.
09:23:41 syv: It's a pity that Coven's probably dead.
09:24:45 syv: Not only do I no longer get to play Ben, I won't hear any more overcomplicated plans to give a succubus superpowers. :(
09:25:26 syv: TBH the latter's prolly the bigger loss, since updates were already far rarer than your planning.
09:26:16 Devastator: well, you could put in your thoughts in the thread.
09:26:21 Devastator: It might just be exam time,
syv.
09:27:01 Devastator: I did offer to rewrite the charsheets and simplify what powers she has into something easy to solve.
09:27:07 Devastator: but it's the writing that took so time.
09:27:30 Devastator: If I'm off another week I might run a brief game for you guys through PMs.
09:28:39 Devastator: besides, succubus had superpowers. And I thought you said I couldn't use that term for her. ;-p
09:29:07 syv: Catmouse setting isn't anywhere near done, though, due me having a shifting schedule and higher priorities.
09:30:16 syv: Meh, you used the term often enough. IIRC I was just making fun of her general lack of actual sex and seduction; she largely got by on super high charisma, not actual flirting, let alone anything serious.
09:30:59 syv: And even if she already had superpowers, you were constantly plotting to give her more. Wasn't she gonna steal a unicorn's glamour or something? Or was it an elf's?
09:32:34 Devastator: Either would be fine.
09:32:39 Devastator: whatever proved easier to seduce.
09:32:55 Devastator: and that was mostly avoiding the forum guidelines and making
NJW not have to actually describe that.
09:33:04 Devastator: although I'm pretty sure I would have done some of that sooner or later.
09:35:15 syv: Forum guidelines are pretty loose, plenty of sex happens in games, it's just not detailed. I'd be kinda surprised if
NJW were particularly uncomfortable eith fade-to-black stuff, unless he just disliked the inherently lazy nature of such things. Ah well. In the past, now.
09:36:51 Devastator: You could post your bit in the thread at some point.
09:37:01 Devastator: might get an epilogue at least. ;-p
09:38:19 syv: Eh, guess it can't hurt.
NJW prolly likes his players saying they enjoyed the game.
09:45:01 Devastator: Still, one goal would have been 'have sex with something not humanoid.'
09:48:12 Devastator: Sure, whatever that means.
09:49:46 syv: It's a twitter meme tag thing typically used alongside reposts about some romantic/cute thing a couple did, implying the poster hopes to achieve that in their own relationship.
09:51:25 syv: I kind've used it as a pun because it's ambiguous enough to also mean "having a relationship with X thing", which also contrasts with the normal meaning since it's kind've the opposite of romantic. And would probably ruin most normal relationships.
09:51:44 syv: So now I made a shitty pun on a stupid meme, and to make it triply bad, explained the joke.
09:55:56 Devastator: ruin most normal relationships?
09:56:43 Devastator: I suppose, but what would be the normal relationship with something like that?
09:59:03 syv: For something that #relationshipgoals would be used for? A completely normal romantic relationship between two normal humans. The vast majority of which would probably significantly stressed if one of the partners expressed an interest in bestiality as a major goal.
09:59:43 syv: Sure, doesn't apply to Nan, but this joke was never on point. I blame getting two hours of sleep,
10:00:42 Devastator: I meant a normal bestiality-including relationship.
10:02:19 Devastator: ie, the other partner is an animal already. ;-p
10:03:50 syv: I think "normal bestiality-including relationship" is an oxymoron.
10:04:36 Devastator: unless the partner is only interested in bestiality, except for nan.
10:05:53 syv: I think this is still pretty abnormal, however you twist it.
10:07:10 Devastator: Hey, I suppose it's better than 'Have sex with the undead.' ;-p
10:07:35 Devastator: Although Katia's done both of those.
10:07:46 syv: Disagree. Sex with vampires is totally mainstream.
10:08:22 syv: There was like a whole series of young adult romance movies specifically ABOUT that.
10:10:01 Devastator: I'm sure I could have found something nastier than a vampire.
10:10:22 Devastator: "Have sex with a non-humanoid undead."
10:10:48 syv: Oh, certainly. We had a bone lich who was prolly ready and willing. But that's YOU being disturbing, not the goal itself.
10:11:40 syv: Morally speaking it's probably still "better", at least by utilitarian morals. Screwing an animated corpse is hard to construe as animal abuse.
10:12:24 Devastator: Even if it's an animated corpse of an animal?
10:13:47 syv: Well, it's not alive any more to be abused.
10:14:14 syv: Animal abuse is only bad when the animal's alive to experience it.
10:15:00 syv: I'm pretty sure it's legal to punch and kick a deer corpse, though people would prolly still look down on it.
10:15:19 Devastator: I'm sure I could come up with something that violates that combination of things.
10:16:43 Devastator: It's undead, but the mind of the animal is also enslaved rather than destroyed.
10:17:07 Devastator: although at this point we're going beyond what could be accomplished just by adding another glamour to Nan.
10:17:09 syv: Kill an animal and then trap its soul inside its rotten corpse specifically so that it can suffer when you rape it. As a 'bonus' it won't die from the abuse. Congrats, you have become more hateable than Hitler.
10:18:36 Devastator: Well, now you're getting closer to why I don't like the Doctor.
10:19:02 Devastator: Just put 'Person' in place of 'Animal' and you've got something related to
ER.
10:19:50 syv: Oh, that Doctor. That Doctor has always been hateable, he's a villain, and he's fun because of it. He's a horrible monster, but in an entertaining way.
10:20:27 syv: Contrast with the necromantic nercophiliac rapist, who is not even vaugely entertaining and is just 100% transgressive.
10:21:41 Devastator: eh, I wouldn't have done stuff for no gain. Admittedly, bestiality would have been for being transgressive, but it wouldn't have happened until there was an obvious reason to do it.
10:21:46 Devastator: Mostly just that it would be on the table.
10:22:30 Devastator: Animals with glamours would have lead to that, most likely.
10:22:30 syv: Y'know, I really should've expected this when I said that I'd miss your absurd succubus planning.
10:22:42 Devastator: Well, yeah, you're kinda asking me to do that.
10:22:55 syv: You've never been the sort to drop a topic just because it's no longer relevant.
10:23:05 syv looks up at the ER reference
10:24:01 syv: Years from now, PS will be long dead, and you'll still be PMing me with questions about how to wish Alida into a vertical wolf.
10:25:31 Devastator: Well, I did drop it
syv.
10:25:41 Devastator: You then said that you'd miss it.
10:25:45 Devastator: so I'm providing it again.
10:32:28 Devastator: Eh, maybe
NJW would write occasional scenes.
10:34:15 Devastator: 'Seduce unicorn' would probably be something along the lines of using a converted horse trailer with the equipment to drain the power, like that van with the magic source guy, and Nan would just use some temporary boosting item to sucker it into entering the van, and then use her skills to keep it quiescent as it is drained.
10:35:32 syv: I don't even know if you can have good phrasing for that...
10:38:25 Devastator: I'd probably have to scent up the inside of the trailer by living in it for a day or so, becuase I'm pretty sure it would be unhealthy to be next to a horny unicorn, and probably need something to knock it out, but it'd be doable.
10:38:51 Devastator: Horny stallions are already a pain in the ass to control.
10:40:45 syv: Yeah, and if it's a unicorn then it's extra horny.
10:40:56 Devastator: Yes, that was intentional.
10:41:09 Devastator: Was going to go with 'rampant', but horny seemed to be better.
10:43:31 Devastator: Of course, should she intentionally go for a female unicorn?
10:43:39 Devastator: I don't think it'd make a diffrence.
10:44:15 syv: A female unicorn is somewhat less likely to kill her, so there's that.
10:45:29 syv: Oh, I looked it up, apparently there WAS a guy who died from horse sex. Intestinal puncture. Apparently, had survived prior encounters, so it's not reliably lethal... but it's definitely not safe, either.
10:45:45 Devastator: Probably, but they can be pretty agressive when on heat, too.
10:45:55 Devastator: They dont' always want sex, but when they want it they can want it pretty bad.
10:46:05 syv: I do live with horses, y'know.
10:46:33 Devastator: Intestinal puncture?
10:46:40 Devastator: I'm assuming that means the obvious was going on.
10:52:38 Devastator: oh well. Sir Elventide updated his everything goes game.
10:53:11 Devastator: Everyone still seems to have difficultly understanding that a character with no stats needs no weapon, as that only helps those who have stats.
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11:01:05 Topic for #einsteinianroulette: Intergalactic Day of Mourning for 2016 (2016-2016)
11:01:05 Topic set by Remalle!Variety@i2246816zi629tu21.vc.shawcable.net [Tuesday 03 January 2017, 06:26:56]
11:07:34 Devastator: If that's the best trailer, it's not going to be any good.
11:08:19 Devastator: If you're going to subside entirely on style, Cowboy Bebop is better.
11:09:05 syv: Cowbow Bebop doesn't have anti-materiel gunscythes though. And very few creaturss getting shot and bisected.
11:09:51 Devastator: that one doesn't have creatures getting shot and bisected.
11:10:09 syv: You're talking to a person who loves Warframe.
11:11:04 syv: "Oh! Look! This room is full of twenty identical grunts, none of whom can hurt me, and who look identical to the last million grunts I killed!"
11:11:16 syv mashes E while laughing maniacally.
11:11:51 syv: "Yay, they're being dismembered in the same exact way they're always being dismembered!"
11:11:58 Devastator: but that's an action game, right?
11:13:32 Devastator: works different than things I'm watching or forum games.
11:15:51 syv: But yeah. Cowboy Bebop has characters I find boring doing things that I don't care about, for a purpose that doesn't matter, with very few characters dying, and generally in uninteresting ways. It has style, but not any style that appeals to *me*.
11:17:08 syv: Low poly anime girl shooting and chopping apart cheaply animated werewolves? This is my style, and even if it's LQ, it appeals. Pity the show itself has pretty much none of that and is instead shittily written relationships.
11:17:16 Devastator: sStill a lot more style than black werewolves.
11:17:52 Devastator: To me that says 'action', but no fun action.
11:17:56 syv: Meh. It's boring tropes either way. One appeals to me, the other appeals to you.
11:18:21 syv: Also, gunscythe is awesome, I don't care what you say, it is awesome.
11:21:16 Devastator: I hate it when choices don't matter.
11:21:33 syv: Hah, choices matter in Bebop?
11:22:13 Devastator: More than in settings with gunscythes.
11:22:36 syv: At the end of every ep, the protags are still alive, and return to status quo with no money. The villains are sabotaged, but probably not dead.
11:23:19 syv: You should quit PS then, 'cause if anyone asked to have a gunscythe totem, they'd totally get it, and it would be more effective than a sword or fishing club.
11:23:21 Devastator: they kill some dudes.
11:23:37 Devastator: That's fine. You're telling me choices don't matter in PS?
11:23:38 syv: Sometimes they just run away, or punch dudes.
11:23:51 syv: If having gunscythes means that, then yes, I am.
11:25:18 Devastator: the thing is,
syv, I said 'settings with gunscythes'
11:25:31 Devastator: besides, the gun part won't work.
11:25:47 syv: Ahh, so the game will only go to shit once that player joins. I get it.
11:26:34 syv: Gun part could work. Same as any guns, it needs to load actual ammo, or be a medium for manabolts. Sure, it's an impractical idea, but rule of awesome.
11:27:35 syv: Gunscythe could also be any of the three totem types, player's choice. Only one, and it's permanently fixed which, but it meets the criteria for all of them.
11:27:38 Devastator: ran into a cheater in surviv.
11:27:52 Devastator: guy had issues with shotgun max range.
11:28:20 Devastator: thing is, I didn't notice it was a cheater until the killshot, where I did my usual fake people out things and the guy flick-shotted 120 degress for a perfect hit.
11:30:24 syv: I think I might write gunscythes into that cat vs mouse setting, just to taunt you. Gunmuskets, used by mice.
11:33:38 Devastator: I'll even make them proper fighting scythes.
11:33:52 syv: Not if I specify they aren't~
11:33:54 Devastator: turn the blade 90 degrees.
11:34:09 syv: Stupidity is the only option!
11:34:36 Devastator: yes, 90 degrees in the wrong direction.
11:34:42 Devastator: so the blade goes back towards the holder.
11:34:50 syv: ...Though, honestly, actual warscythe design isn't much better for putting on a musket.
11:35:07 Devastator: but it wouldn't be that big of a change to a reasonable bayonet style.
11:35:27 syv: Yes, it's a better design in general, but slashing with a musket is not going to work no matter where the blade points.
11:35:35 Devastator: besides, mice probably went with the whole spear thing.
11:35:42 syv: At that point you're just making a spear with a sharp edge.
11:36:11 syv: Yeah, mice infantry prefer pikes. Honor guard can use stupid equipment though, they're ceremonial.
11:36:51 Devastator: hey, spear with sharp edge might be good. Cat falls on it, it cuts in better.
11:37:38 syv: Eh. Boar spear is more what you'd want, methinks.
11:38:01 Devastator: Also, Elventide thinks I'm missing a meat shield between my guy and the enemy. I pointed out that the enemy would likely just attack the enemy that has the least stealth, rendering the meat shield bit relevant.
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13:43:22 Devastator: "Fuck you, Doga. Things would be so much easier if you weren't the world's biggest dickhole."
13:43:34 Devastator: Also, the sprite for the sage in 8 bit theater.
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18:52:10 Devastator: Maybe I should wish.
18:52:55 ER: yeah, that way you, too, can fall to the ground in agony and lose 5 years of your life!
18:53:26 Devastator: That moth might make me lose more than five years.
18:56:03 Devastator: "I can, for an hour, assume the form of a dragon."
19:02:01 Devastator: Damn shame it's 1985, or I'd wish for a full pokéball. ;-p
19:27:55 Devastator: Summary: The wings have horses
19:27:59 Devastator: but the horses have no wings
19:28:07 Devastator: The wolf warriors are expected to run away
19:28:13 Devastator: The spearment have no spears
19:28:22 Devastator: the first-line men are in the second or third line.
19:28:32 Devastator: and the most experienced warriors are qualified to do next to nothing.
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20:26:35 Radio_Controlled: Good evening you reverse time owls.
20:33:29 Radio_Controlled: Not for long though.
20:33:35 Radio_Controlled: How are you though?
20:34:15 Devastator: work got pushed back a bit.
20:34:25 Devastator: gas pipeline explosion.
20:34:47 Devastator: Probably going to find out the clownshoes company has been fucking it up and should have known, but the report isn't out yet.
20:37:33 Radio_Controlled: Maybe the problem is that you make clownshoe companies work on pipelines.
20:38:15 Devastator: It's not a small pipeline company..
20:38:39 Radio_Controlled: Of course not, they'd be terrible clownshoes if they were small.
20:45:02 Devastator: Giant moth is giving me trouble.
20:49:23 Devastator: facing a moth the size of a small aircraft.
20:49:36 Devastator: figures the game I don't want a flying mount in is the one where one turns up.
20:50:00 Radio_Controlled: Convince it that physics says it should not be able to support its own weight.
20:50:11 Radio_Controlled: Watch it go down in a puff of logic.
20:50:50 Devastator: That might work better.
20:51:02 Devastator: May have to wish up a solution.
20:56:38 Devastator: Oh, apparently the double buff is currently at cat ears for Saeko. ;-p
20:57:13 Radio_Controlled: You can perma buff senses now as well?
20:58:24 Devastator: these are two temp buffs.
20:58:41 Devastator: It might make it easier to do a permanent d10 by doing it one sense at a time, too.
20:59:24 Radio_Controlled: Seems to be stretching that 'strengthen' word a bit there.
20:59:37 Radio_Controlled: But hey, if
pw is down with it, good for you!
21:00:15 Devastator: It's a really good work.
21:00:39 Devastator: Apparently from the inside of a room in an inn I can tell that people are walking into the water over a dozen blocks away.
21:01:41 Radio_Controlled: So not only do you have sharp hearing, but you can also filter out all of the interfering sounds as well?
21:03:06 Devastator: That's what I specifically put in the initial spell.
21:05:10 Radio_Controlled: Pretty useful either way.
21:05:33 Radio_Controlled: Oh hey pan won his match in a single stroke again, but now that guy is being all prissy about it.
21:05:57 Devastator: or that pan is cheating?
21:06:05 Devastator: I'm sure if you show up with cat ears they'll be thinking you're cheating. ;-p
21:07:10 Radio_Controlled: Pan's opponent is being a sore loser basically.
21:07:27 Radio_Controlled: Seems to have murderous intent.
21:07:46 Radio_Controlled: He gots them killer eyes, he has.
21:07:47 Devastator: well, go get some more blood on your hands.
21:08:42 Radio_Controlled: Gonna go for a disorienting spell if he keeps pressing the attack, maybe that will give the judges a chance to put a stop to it.
21:09:23 Radio_Controlled: Killing a dude if he's coming at you with clear intent to kill is fair self-defence, I'm sure Saeko would do the same if pressed.
21:09:44 Devastator: She didn't, actually.
21:11:01 Devastator: She's not an absolute pacifist, but you've gotta do better than that.
21:11:21 Radio_Controlled: Guess she didn't really get pressed then.
21:12:15 Radio_Controlled: Hmm, wondering what word I should use for the illusion/distraction, preferably something that doesn't give Darwin away as a wizard.
21:13:01 Devastator: What words do you have?
21:13:44 Devastator: That was a guy infested by an anger spirit and raging while crossbow armed. Distracted, disarmed, restrained, diagnosed, and cured.
21:14:32 Radio_Controlled: Vacuum! Reanimate Sharpen Viscera Diamond
21:14:54 Radio_Controlled: Yeah, see, nothing too bad.
21:15:29 Devastator: What's the other guy wearing?
21:15:32 Radio_Controlled: Think I'm gonna make him think his guts are spilling out of him, that should be entertaining if it works.
21:15:59 Devastator: I was thinking that you'd make his clothes fall off.
21:16:10 Radio_Controlled: Some gladiator armor, not sure what exactly.
21:16:44 Radio_Controlled: What word would I use for that, that isn't a stretch in terms of word meaning (which would make the spell harder)?
21:16:54 Radio_Controlled: Also even disrobed he could still press the attack.
21:17:03 Radio_Controlled: It's something to keep in mind though.
21:18:25 Devastator: Sharpen the edges of the armour that's connected to the cloth fasteners.
21:18:37 Devastator: Make it temporary to increase the sharpness to a ridiculous degree.
21:18:44 Devastator: It'll then fall off him.
21:19:10 Radio_Controlled: That's no longer senses though I think.
21:19:43 Radio_Controlled: know and senses are my best stats, so should be one of those ideally.
21:20:18 Devastator: It's probably a low challenge.
21:20:42 Radio_Controlled: versus d10 senses.
21:20:57 Devastator: I've been using d6 buffs for those ears.
21:22:04 Devastator: welll, you could illusion that pan's guy is completely covered in blood and guts, but just for that one guy specifically.
21:22:31 Radio_Controlled: Yeah, that'd probably confuse him.
21:24:00 Radio_Controlled: Kind of the same as the current illusion though? Might be a bit easier I suppose, but I think I'll just be rolling against the npc's senses stat.
21:24:30 Radio_Controlled: No wait, still have the roll for the spell itself first.
21:24:48 Devastator: I'm really going to be disappointed if the whole town is getting killed this night.
21:25:28 Radio_Controlled: Why would that happen?
21:25:39 Radio_Controlled: You guys gonna rave that fucking hard?
21:28:24 Devastator: The magic ears are picking up people leaving their houses and going into the lake, combined with orbs of light going past.
21:29:33 Devastator: Saeko can't ignore that.
21:29:43 Radio_Controlled: Yeah, she's gotta go spike the punchbowl.
21:30:02 Devastator: with a lovely 4 mana.
21:30:14 Devastator: although I think I'm going to intercept someone en-route to the lake.
21:30:21 Devastator: should be easily able to find someone.
21:30:34 Radio_Controlled: Those rowdy teens don't need help making bad life decisions, but dammit she can try to do her part.
21:31:14 Radio_Controlled: You should have kept the angry turtle. Could have dried it and ground it to powder, then spike the booze with evil spirit powder.
21:31:36 Radio_Controlled: That ought to liven up a party somehow.
21:33:34 Devastator: It's an underwater party.
21:36:44 Devastator: lets hope it isn't two months for AVA.
21:39:02 Radio_Controlled: Welp, I'm off to bed, long day tomorrow.
21:39:18 Radio_Controlled: Good night sweet prince, it was nice catching you in here again.
21:39:32 Radio_Controlled: Say hi to the other IRC denizens for me when they show up!
21:48:50 Devastator: I really wish I could just ignore this.
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